Bob Martin on Why Singles Should Hear Messages on Marriage

The thought of a marriage series for singles might seem odd. Like most Christian single people, I was a huge fan of marriage. But I wasn’t married. And I didn’t know if or when God would give me a spouse. Although God did give me the gift of a wife when I was thirty-one years old, I am still indebted to the people in my life who taught me about marriage before I ever entered into it.  

Here are four reasons why I believe we need a marriage series for singles: 

1. It Helps Us Realize Marriage Can Work

The current realities of marriage in the U.S. are painful. Many of my peer millennials come from homes with divorced parents; and even though there’s a chance the divorce rate is decreasing, that doesn’t necessarily mean more are living healthy life-long covenants. Instead, more are looking to cohabiting as their solution to a distrust of the difficult relationship called “marriage.” 

I don’t need to belabor the many problems we face in a culture seeking to reshape marriage, sex, and relationships. But I can say that this is why we need a community of others to tell us what marriage really is and that it can work!  

Perhaps you have seen marriage fall apart or your own marriage has done so. Hearing God’s Word proclaimed about marriage and helping ourselves and others apply God’s vision together in a Small Group is just what the doctor has ordered for most of us. We should have hope that God can use us to help our friends with their marriages; and we should have hope that God can empower us to fulfill that same covenant if he calls us into it.

2. It Helps Us Understand Our Married Friend’s Experience

Singleness is hard. And in the midst of singleness, I often forgot that marriage is hard too. Being in a Small Group with others who were married helped transform my perspective—especially when I saw their failings. 

This is when your married friends need you: to support them as they stumble along in figuring out how to love someone else “as Christ loved the church” (Ephesians 5:25) or “submit in everything” to someone else (Ephesians 5:24) or in how to run away from the same temptations that you face in singleness (lust, selfishness, pride) with someone else always nearby. Discussing these things opens up greater understanding to the breadth of experiences a married person is going through: not always just what you might expect. 

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Source: Church Leaders